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 Finding balance

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MsPattyR



Posts : 24
Join date : 2011-02-01

PostSubject: Finding balance   Mon Feb 21, 2011 12:08 pm

Reading Eileen's log sparked this - I had a really rough week. I'm pretty sure I had a panic attack reflecting on all I need to accomplish for the wedding, my committment the 1/2 marathon and a never ending cycle of housework that doesn't get done. I have belonged to a working mother's network since I became pregnant with the twins almost 11 years ago. they have been with me through EVERYTHING. We bounce ideas from work, sex, recipes, and kids off of each other in a closed forum.

I went to their board asking for suggestions on how to make myself and my girls be more consistent in the chores. As of yesterday - they are responsible for doing their own laundry. I am admitting to the world I CANT DO IT ALL. Most of the moms had great ideas but one - she retorted that it was a wonder my house wasnt clean as I spend so much time on MYSELF WORKING OUT Crying or Very sad I was sad to say the least. I beat myself up about it for a day or so until I came here, read the lovely logs of you strong lovely woman and knew - IF I CANNOT BE GOOD TO MYSELF, I WILL NOT BE ANY GOOD TO ANYONE ELSE. My workouts bring me bliss!

I would never miss an event for a child or Herm or do anything that doesnt fit with my family dynamic. I just wanted advice on how to do it better. So I have a white board - with chores and gave laundry lessons yesterday and already feel better.

thank you for letting me vent Smile
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sbornheimer



Posts : 99
Join date : 2011-02-02
Age : 57
Location : New York

PostSubject: hmmm   Fri Mar 04, 2011 2:05 pm

I would say that the hater that said something about you not having things done at home because you're always working out, doesn't work out. And doesn't understand the bliss surrounding it.

Sounds like sour grapes because I'm sure you look good and how dare you. You were asking for how to improve and you got a toad out the haters mouth. Sigh. The good thing is by the end of your post I could see that you have it in perspective. Healthy. Stay up!
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cynthiaj

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Posts : 24
Join date : 2011-02-01

PostSubject: Re: Finding balance   Sat Mar 05, 2011 9:33 pm

Ha. That's almost the same thing my not-yet-ex used to throw at me. If the house wasn't spotless (which it never was, despite continuous cleaning & tidying, and huge focus put on that with the kids) it was because I was spending too much time doing unimportant things and being "selfish" - for example, I went to karate from 12-1 most days. Never mind that I was up at 6:45, made breakfast, got all 4 kids ready for the day and off to school, did all the shopping and cooking and laundry and finances etc.. picked kids up at 3 and went through the after-school routine of sports etc.. then dinner, baths, stories, homework & bedtime, prepped for the next day and then eventually went to bed at 11 for a broken (disturbed by kids frequently) night of poor sleep... that ONE HOUR I spent doing karate OBVIOUSLY was the reason why life was not perfect.

It may be obvious why he is becoming my ex Wink

So, poop on those who tell you that if you would stop doing things for yourself then everything else would be better. If you DON'T take some time to feed yourself (physically, mentally & spiritually) then NOTHING else is going to go right.

Rock on, Patty! Keep on organizing and delegating... and letting go of the idea that you have to do it all, yourself, and perfectly.
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sbornheimer



Posts : 99
Join date : 2011-02-02
Age : 57
Location : New York

PostSubject: :-)   Sat Mar 05, 2011 10:55 pm

I like that cynthiaj.
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